Wednesday, October 12, 2005



OK, so you might be wondering why I called this site "Freak Magnet Dave". So far I haven't written of any dealings with some of the freaky folk out there, but believe me, I've had my share.

Just this week, The Squeeze and I were at a going-away party for some friends who are moving away (makes sense, n'est pas?). We felt just slightly out of place since we knew NOBODY there except the couple leaving, their kids and a friend of my departing friend I had previously met. We did a little bit of mingling, but since we were only staying a short time we didn't want to make any commitments or promises of extended conversations with these unknown people.

At one point we were standing near a grouping of chairs and this woman strikes up a conversation with The Squeeze and I. I should have known something was up when she asked "are you related to (the departing), or are you family?" Umm....where I come from, being related pretty much makes you family. So I said "neither, we're just friends". I used to work with "The Mrs." a few years back, and we've become good friends.

I took the opportunity to abandon The Squeeze and cross the room to sign the little guest book they had set up. I finished writing my note in the book and headed back across. The Squeeze was giving me this "GOD, HELP ME!" look. When I got to him he said, "well, we should get going".

After saying our good-byes we headed for the car and The Squeeze said "holy bible thumpers!" As it turned out, as soon as I walked toward the book, the woman asked The Squeeze what he did for a living. The Squeeze told her that he worked in pest control. She asked what he meant by that, so to dumb it down a bit he said "I'm an exterminator".
"Well, we're exterminators of sorts too," she said motioning to her husband. "We exterminate demons."
"Check, please!"
ok...he didn't say that, but I think I might have.

So this woman goes on to tell him all about the souls she has saved in the name of the Lord, blah, blah, blah. She went on to state that soon we will be destroyed by a natural disaster that is headed right for our area. Uhhh...right.
There was a whole lot of "Those who serve the Lord will be persecuted." Leads me to then why set yourself up?
She asked The Squeeze if he was a Christian, so to avoid a serious in-your-face conversion, he just said "ya, sure".
When he told me this I just laughed.
"Why didn't you just tell her that you find it completely inappropriate and offensive to discuss religion with strangers?"
"I like your boundaries" he said.
"Ya, you could call it that...I just think it's a nicer way to say 'hey, shut your pie-hole'"
The Squeeze is still a bit freaked out by it all. I just kind of chuckle. I guess in this case, it's The Squeeze who is the Freak Magnet.

LOL! Poor Squeeze!
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